All posts by Renette

My First Impression of Mockingjay

I know Mockingjay was supposed to come out last August 24, and I reserved a copy in several bookstores here in Singapore. However, none of them knew when the book was actually coming out. Finally, after what felt like weeks in agony, someone from Harris (in Somerset 313) called to inform me that I could get my copy on that day. That was on a Thursday, August 26. I had plans for the night, but dropped by the bookstore, and started reading it as soon as I could. Even though I had work early the next day, I didn’t want to rush things, so I took it slowly and finished at 4:15 am. After 3 hours of sleep, I headed to work.

Before you continue reading, let me give you a big SPOILER ALERT. I’m going to talk about how the book ends, so feel free to go somewhere else if you don’t want to read any spoilers.

Here are some things I liked (or not liked) about Mockingjay – in no particular order.

1. There wasn’t too much mushy gooey stuff happening between Katniss and Peeta – whether it’s real or not real (*wink*wink*). I mean, I like them both and wanted them to be together in the end, but I don’t really want to read too much lovey-dovey conversations.

2. The book did a good job of showing how broken and psychogically unstable a person can be after exposure to so much violence. You begin to understand why Haymitch is the way he is. After all, who wouldn’t want to escape reality if your reality is like that?

3. I actually liked how the Gale-Katniss relationship was concluded to pave the way for Peeta. With Katniss never really knowing whether Gale was responsible for Prim’s death – it’s just haunting and so final.

4. I’m not sure I like the idea of President Snow dying because he choked on his blood while laughing too hard. It’s not exactly the ending I envisioned for him.

5. However, the way Katniss assasinated President Coin instead of Snow is truly something I didn’t expect. Although I’ve been ambivalent about Coin from the start – never really knowing on which side she is, I sort of wanted some kind of confrontation between Katniss and Coin.

6. Another thing I didn’t expect was how Peeta’s first action upon seeing Katniss was to try to kill her. I mean, who on earth would have seen that coming? It’s like you keep waiting for Peeta to make an appearance, but when he does, it’s not the Peeta you expect.

7. I don’t like the way Finnick died though. It was too low-key for such a major character for both books 2 and 3.

8. I had the feeling that another major character would die towards the end, but I didn’t want it to be Prim. Because the entire story started when Katniss volunteered for the Hunger Games to save Prim’s life, and in the end it was still Prim who dies while Katniss survives.

9. I like the relationship that developed between Katniss and Johanna. I bet if they both weren’t so prickly, especially with each other, they would actually become pretty good friends.

10. Though it may seem like a contradiction to the first point I raised, I was a bit disappointed that there were so few tender moments between Katniss and Peeta.

Dancing to T Pain

I wouldn’t really call myself a T. Pain fan, nor would I ever endorse the lyrics of this song which is just wrong on so many levels. But I have to admit I loved the scene in Step Up 2 where Tyler (Channing Tatum) and Andie (Briana Evigan) had a dance-off to this song.

I’ve seen other people dancing to this song after that, but I’ve never really liked it since I always invariably compare it to the dance scene in Step Up 2. But then I saw Twitch and Courtney using NappyTabs’ choreography in So You Think You Can Dance, and I have to say – I liked this as well. Here’s the full video of the performance.

The Cast of PRIDE AND PREJUDICE – 1995 vs 2005 (The Bingleys and the Darcys)

I love the 2005 Pride and Prejudice movie staring Keira Knightley and Matthew MacFadyen so much that it took me a while to warm up to the 1995 TV series starring Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth. Now, I’ll have to say I love both equally.

In a previous blog entry, I compared the performances of the 1995 and 2005 cast for the Bennet family and chose the ones I liked better. I kept a tally (which I will continue here) to see which adaptation wins for me in terms of individual cast performances.The final tally for the Bennets showed 3 votes for 2005 (Jane, Lizzie and Kitty Bennet) and 4 votes for 1995 (Mr. and Mrs. Bennet, Mary and Lydia Bennet). Now, I will move on to the Bingleys and the Darcys, and will keep the running tally as well to include the Bennets.

CAROLINE BINGLEY

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Anna Chancellor (1995) vs Kelly Reilly (2005)  

I got distracted watching Kelly Reilly because I kept trying to remember where I saw her before (I checked IMDB afterwards and found out that she was Mary Morstan in the latest Sherlock Holmes movie). My only problem with her is that I thought she was a little too openly mean, which makes it very obvious for anyone who’s watching that she detests the Bennets. Anna Chancellor was a bit more sly.

TALLY for Bingleys/Darcys – 2005: 0, 1995: 1

RUNNING TALLY (including Bennets) – 2005: 3, 1995: 5

CHARLES BINGLEY

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Crispin Bonham-Carter (1995) vs Simon Woods (2005)

I liked both of them a lot, but I felt that Simon Woods’ Mr. Bingley felt rather flat to me (though he is more handsome). To be fair, there wasn’t enough time to flesh him out in the span of two hours of course, so this is not his fault. I really really liked the scene where he is practicing his proposal with Mr. Darcy, especially when he bowed to Mr. Darcy and said, “Miss Bennet” and Mr. Darcy bowed back and replied, “Mr. Bingley.” Despite this, I still thought that Crispin Bonham-Carter did a better job.

TALLY for Bingleys/Darcys – 2005: 0, 1995: 2

RUNNING TALLY (including Bennets) – 2005: 3, 1995: 6

GEORGINA DARCY

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Emilia Fox (1995) vs Tamzin Merchant (2005) 

Tamzin Merchant wins this one for me without a doubt for three reasons: first, she looked like she’s really 15 (the age of Georgina Darcy) while I thought Emilia Fox looked older; second, she showed personality and life, even though she had probably less than 5 minutes of screen time; and third, she did her own piano playing – and she’s really good. I wish I could play “Georgiana” on the piano(forte) too.

TALLY for Bingleys/Darcys – 2005: 1, 1995: 2

RUNNING TALLY (including Bennets) – 2005: 4, 1995: 6

FITZWILLIAM DARCY

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Colin Firth (1995) vs Matthew MacFadyen (2005) 

This is definitely the hardest one I had to judge. I know that one of the criticisms for Matthew MacFadyen’s portrayal was that his Mr. Darcy was too mopey and had very limited facial expressions, but then we must consider that the movie only spanned two hours, which is considerably less time to flesh out the character as compared to what Colin Firth was able to do in six hours. I do think that Colin Firth is a genius and he was able to really portray the agony of Mr. Darcy. However, though I liked both of their performances very much, I will have to give this to Matthew MacFadyen mainly because of his intensity in the proposal scene in the rain.

TALLY for Bingleys/Darcys – 2005: 2, 1995: 2

RUNNING TALLY (including Bennets) – 2005: 5, 1995: 6

As a summary, I liked the 1995 Bingleys and the 2005 Darcys, so we end with a tie. However, since the 1995 was one vote ahead of the 2005 for the Bennets, the 1995 is still currently in the lead in my running tally.

The Cast of PRIDE AND PREJUDICE – 1995 vs 2005 (The Bennets)

Like a lot of people, I saw the 2005 Pride and Prejudice movie before I saw the 1995 adaptation. Since I was so blown away by the 2005 movie, it took me a while to begin appreciating the 1995 TV series. Now I love both – the 2005 movie for its unbelievable soundtrack (I’m currently learning to play “Dawn” on the piano) and breathtaking cinematography, as well as the intense chemistry between Keira Knightley’s Elizabeth Bennet and Matthew MacFadyen’s Mr. Darcy; and the 1995 TV series for its length (6 hours! quite enough to bring to life a lot more of the story) and faithfulness to the novel.

In this blog entry, I will try to compare the performances of the cast, and pick the one I liked better. Since there are so many of them, I will start with the family from Longbourn, the Bennet family.

MR. BENNET

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Benjamin Whitrow (1995) vs Donald Sutherland (2005) 

Much as I like Donald Sutherland as an actor, I think Benjamin Whitrow was able to capture the crustiness of the character in general. But there was one line by Donald Sutherland that I particularly loved. This was when he said, “How happy for you, Mr. Collins, to possess the talent of flattering with such (pause) delicacy.”

TALLY – 2005: 0, 1995: 1

MRS. BENNET

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Alison Steadman (1995) vs Brenda Blethyn (2005)

They were both able to portray the cringe-enducing character of Mrs. Bennet, but I prefer Alison Steadman because she was shriller and a lot more over the top and ridiculous, adding a bit of comic relief.

TALLY – 2005: 0, 1995: 2

JANE BENNET

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Susannah Harker (1995) vs Rosamund Pike (2005) 

I thought Susannah Harker looked a little too old to play the part of the lovely Jane Bennet. I also thought she was a little too passive and beatific, so I guess it’s safe to say Rosamund Pike wins it for me. She was not only incredibly lovely, she was also very composed and kind.

TALLY – 2005: 1, 1995: 2

ELIZABETH BENNET

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Jennifer Ehle (1995) vs Keira Knightley (2005)

This was the easiest choice for me. At first, I couldn’t get myself to watch the 1995 adaptation because Jennifer Ehle did not meet my idea of Lizzie – except for her dark hair. She was, once more, a little too old and a little too smiley for my taste. And I got distracted by the fact that she had a resemblance to Meryl Streep. I’m sorry. I guess it’s just that I thought Keira Knightley played the role of Lizzie extremely well.

TALLY – 2005: 2, 1995: 2

MARY BENNET

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Lucy Briers (1995) vs Talulah Riley (2005) 

Both of them didn’t have much screen time, but I’m going for Lucy Briers because she was more plain-looking and had more of a touch of conceit about her accomplishments and wisdom. I actually thought that Talulah Riley was quite pretty and had a nice voice.

TALLY – 2005: 2, 1995: 3

KITTY BENNET

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Polly Maberly (1995) vs Carey Mulligan (2005) 

This is a very tough call for me since both didn’t have much screen time either. However, I particularly liked Carey Mulligan’s highly excited plea to Mr. Bingley – “Oh, do have a ball!” – when she went with her mother and sisters to Netherfield. Just for that line alone, I’ll have to choose Carey Mulligan though I really liked Polly Maberly as well.

TALLY – 2005: 3, 1995: 3

LYDIA BENNET

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Julia Sawalha (1995) vs Jena Malone (2005)

So the tie-breaker goes to the youngest Bennet. This is another tough call for me because I thought they were both sufficiently irritating and insufferable. The only problem was that I was quite distracted trying to remember where I saw Jena Malone before (it was “The Ruins,” as I found out later on by checking IMDB). I loved Jena Malone’s evident silliness when she said excitedly, “Officers! As far as the eye can see!” However, I would give this win to Julia Sawalha simply for the scene where she was seductively rubbing Mr. Wickham’s back with her toe.

FINAL TALLY – 2005: 3, 1995: 4

For the cast of the Bennet family, the 1995 adaptation wins!

My Favorite Mr. Darcy and Lizzie Scenes from Pride and Prejudice (Part 2 of 2)

My favorite movie at the moment is the 2005 adaptation of Pride and Prejudice directed by Joe Wright. I’ve only seen this movie for the first time more than a week ago (11 June 2010 to be exact) but have since watched it more than 15 times. Here is the second part of my list of top 10 favorite Mr. Darcy and Lizzie scenes in reverse order. Check out the first part here.

# 5 – Proposal at dawn

Though this must be the top favorite of a lot of Pride and Prejudice fans (after all, this was the proposal where Lizzie finally said yes), there are scenes that I enjoyed more. Of course, it’s quite hard to refuse a slightly disheveled looking Mr. Darcy saying “You have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you.” though I’m not even sure if that was a stutter or if he was repeating himself for emphasis. But it was so lovely all the same, and such a perfect way to end the story.

# 4 – And so he smiles.

How can I not love the only scene where Mr. Darcy actually smiles? While Georgiana is playing so well on the pianoforte, Lizzie and the Gardiners arrive. Mr. Darcy seemed much more relaxed and open than we’ve ever seen him before, which is either because of the presence of his sister, or his growing love for Lizzie, or probably a combination of both. I particularly love how proud he seemed to be of his brother, and how so many smiling looks were exchanged between Mr. Darcy and Georgiana, Mr. Darcy and Lizzie, and Georgiana and Lizzie. Such a nice happy family-to-be.

# 3 – The most awkward call of all time

While Lizzie is settled down alone at the Collins, Mr. Darcy storms in and stands fidgeting, looking most awkward and out of his depth. He glances around with a slightly panicked expression on his face, and when it was quite obvious that Lizzie was waiting for him to say something, the only thing he could come up with is, “This is a charming home.” When he hears the arrival of Mrs. Collins, he hurriedly departs with the words, “It’s been a pleasure.” We echo Charlotte’s astonishment when she asked, “What on earth did you to do to poor Mr. Darcy?” and Lizzie replies with equal astonishment, “I have no idea.”

# 2 – Surprise, surprise

Lizzie is visiting Pemberly with her Aunt and Uncle, and she strays away accidentantally and spies Georgina in a room, playing on the pianoforte. This is interrupted by the sudden arrival of her brother, Mr. Darcy, who looks up and sees Lizzie. She tries to run, much embarassed by having been seen by Mr. Darcy in his own estate. He follows her, quite obviously very surprised (though pleased) to see her. His demeanor has already changed much from his stiff and formal attitude before, and you could see how he wanted to stay there talking to her for a longer time. However, she hurries off and turns down his offer to see her back to the village.

# 1 – “I love you. Most ardently.” (a.k.a. the trainwreck proposal)

Without a doubt, this is my favorite scene in the entire movie. Mr. Darcy proposes to Lizzie in the rain by saying that he loves her most ardently, and yet unwittingly insults her in the process. I love this intense scene so much that I better just transcribe the whole conversation here:

Mr. Darcy: Miss Elizabeth. I have struggled in vain and I can bear it no longer. These past months have been a torment. I came to Rosings with the single object of seeing you… I had to see you. I have fought against my better judgment, my family’s expectations, the inferiority of your birth by rank and circumstance. These things I am willing to put aside and ask you to end my agony.

Lizzie: I don’t understand.

Mr. Darcy: I love you. Most ardently. Please do me the honor of accepting my hand.

Lizzie: (after a pause) Sir, I appreciate the struggle you have been through, and I am very sorry to have caused you pain. Believe me, it was unconsciously done.

Mr. Darcy: Is this your reply?

Lizzie: Yes, sir.

Mr. Darcy: Are you… are you laughing at me?

Lizzie: No.

Mr. Darcy: Are you rejecting me?

Lizzie: I’m sure that the feelings which, as you’ve told me have hindered your regard, will help you in overcoming it.

Mr. Darcy: Might I ask why, with so little endeavor at civility, I am thus repulsed?

Lizzie: And I might as well enquire why, with so evident a design of insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your better judgment.

Mr. Darcy: No, believe me, I…

Lizzie: If I was uncivil, then that is some excuse. But I have other reasons, you know I have.

Mr. Darcy: What reasons?

Lizzie: Do you think anything might tempt me to accept the man who has ruined, perhaps forever, the happiness of a most beloved sister? Do you deny it, Mr. Darcy? That you separated a young couple who loved each other, exposing your friend to the censure of the world for caprice and my sister to its derision for disappointed hopes, involving them both in misery of the acutest kind?

Mr. Darcy: I do not deny it.

Lizzie: How could you do it?

Mr. Darcy: Because I believed your sister indifferent.

Lizzie: Indifferent?

Mr. Darcy: I watched them most carefully and realized his attachment was deeper than hers.

Lizzie: That’s because she’s shy!

Mr. Darcy: Bingley too is modest and was persuaded she didn’t feel strongly.

Lizzie: Because you suggested it!

Mr. Darcy: I did it for his own good!

Lizzie: My sister hardly shows her true feelings to me. (silence) I suppose you suspect that his… his fortune had some bearing…

Mr. Darcy: No, believe me I wouldn’t do your sister the dishonour, though it was suggested…

Lizzie: What was?

Mr. Darcy: (after a pause) It was made perfectly clear an advantageous marriage…

Lizzie: (enraged) Did my sister give that impression?

Mr. Darcy: No, no! No, there was, however, I have to admit, the matter of your family…

Lizzie: Our want of connection? Mr. Bingley didn’t seem to vex himself about that…

Mr. Darcy: No, it was more than that.

Lizzie: How, sir?

Mr. Darcy: It was the lack of propriety shown by your mother, your three younger sisters, and even, on occasion, your father. (thunderclaps are heard, Lizzie is obviously hurt) Forgive me. You and your sister I must exclude from this.

Lizzie: And what about Mr. Wickham?

Mr. Darcy: (moves closer) Mr. Wickham?

Lizzie: What excuse can you give your… your behavior towards him?

Mr. Darcy: You take an eager interest in that gentleman’s affairs.

Lizzie: He told of his misfortunes…

Mr. Darcy: Oh yes, his misfortunes have been very great indeed.

Lizzie: You ruined his chances and then you treat him with sarcasm.

Mr. Darcy: So this is your opinon of me? Thank you for explaining so fully. Perhaps these offences might have been overlooked had not your pride been hurt…

Lizzie: My pride?!

Mr. Darcy: …by my honesty in admitting scruples about our relationship. Could you expect me to rejoice in the inferiority of your circumstances?

Lizzie: And those are the words of a gentleman. From the first moment I met you, your arrogance and conceit, your selfish disdain for the feelings of others made me realize that you were the last man in the world I could ever be prevailed upon to marry.

Mr. Darcy: (leans in, looks at Lizzie for a long time as if about to kiss her) Forgive me, madam, for taking up so much of your time.

My Favorite Mr. Darcy and Lizzie Scenes from Pride and Prejudice (Part 1 of 2)

My favorite movie at the moment is the 2005 adaptation of Pride and Prejudice directed by Joe Wright. I’ve only seen this movie for the first time more than a week ago (11 June 2010 to be exact) but have since watched it more than 15 times. Here is the first part of my list of top 10 favorite Mr. Darcy and Lizzie scenes in reverse order. Check out the second part here.

# 10 – Barely tolerable

This is the scene where Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy were talking to Mrs. Bennet, Jane and Lizzie in the ball. In passing, Lizzie mentioned that poetry had the power to drive away love, to which Mr. Darcy replied, “I thought that poetry was the food of love.” Lizzie replied that it may be the case if it’s a “fine stout love,” but not if it is merely a “vague inclination,” at which point a poor sonnet can be counted upon to kill it outright. Mr. Darcy replied, “So what do you recommend to encourage affection?” probably unconsciously planning to file the information for future reference, should he wish to encourage Lizzie’s affection. Lizzie quickly replied: “Dancing. Even if one’s partner is barely tolerable.” then stalked off. This must have suprised him since it shows that she heard his earlier comment that she was “barely tolerable,” and she had the guts to call him to it.

# 9 – No false modesty here

This is the scene where Lizzie is playing piano rather poorly, and Mr. Darcy walks towards the piano to watch her. Lizzie says, “You mean to frighten me, Mr. Darcy, by coming in all your state to hear me, but I won’t be alarmed even if your sister does play so well.” To which Mr. Darcy replied, “I am well enough acquainted with you, Miss Elizabeth, to know that I cannot alarm you, even should I wish it.” I love his look filled with subdued longing after their full exchange, as he gazes at Lizzie.

# 8 – May I have the next dance?

Charlotte and Lizzie are chatting cheerfully, when they are suddenly accosted by the always formal Mr. Darcy, who gravely asked, “Miss Elizabeth, may I have the next dance?” To which Lizzie replied in an equally formal tone, “You may.” Mr. Darcy gives a slight bow before walking off. If you didn’t know that he was already in love with her at that point, you would think he was the most difficult man to get along with.

# 7 – Electrified

Lizzie curtsies stiffly at Mr. Darcy, then bestows a friendly smile and curtsy to Mr. Bingley before she climbs the carriage on the way home. Unexpectedly, it is Mr. Darcy who helps her up, and after exchanging a fleeting look, we get a close up of Mr. Darcy’s hand, which looked as if it was electrified by the touch of Lizzie’s hand.

# 6 – A world of their own

The first time they danced (and their conversation) was so intense that it was as if they were on a world (or on a hallway) on their own. Of course, there are still such witty conversation such as Mr. Darcy asking Lizzie, “Do you talk, as a rule, while dancing?” and Lizzie replying, “No… No, I prefer to be unsociable and taciturn… Makes it all so much more enjoyable, don’t you think? ”

Complete Song List from PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

This is the most difficult song list I’ve ever tried to make, since the soundtrack contained instrumental music. I had to really familiarize myself with the melodies before I could begin making the list.

1. DAWN (track 1)

– Played at the beginning of the movie while the opening credits are showing. Lizzie is walking home and we first get a glimpse of the Bennet’s household (with Mary conveniently playing on the piano).

 2. MERYTOWN HALL (track 4)

– Played during the ball, with Kitty and Lydia dancing while Jane, Lizzie and Charlotte were chatting.  The song suddenly stops midway at the entrance of Mr. Bingley, Ms. Bingley and of course, Mr. Darcy, and resumes once they are at the other end of the hall.

3. ANOTHER DANCE (track 11)

– Played during the same ball while Jane and Mr. Bingley were dancing.

4. STARS AND BUTTERFLIES (track 2)

– Played while Lizzie was walking to Netherfield to visit Jane.

5. THE MILITIA MARCHES IN (track 5)

– Played while Lydia, Kitty and Mrs. Bennet were watching the officers marching into Merytown.

6. ARRIVAL AT NETHERFIELD (track 7)

– Played while the Bennets are preparing for the ball at Netherfield until they get there.

7. CAN’T SLOW DOWN (track 14)

– Played while Lizzie is dancing with Mr. Collins.

8. A POSTCARD TO HENRY PURCELL (track 8)

– Played in the very intense scene where Lizzie is dancing with Mr. Darcy.

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9. LEAVING NETHERFIELD (track 10)

– Played while Mr. Bingley, Miss Bingley and Mr. Darcy were, well, what else… leaving Netherfield.

10. THE SECRET LIFE OF DAYDREAMS (track 12)

– Played while Lizzie is on the swing after Charlotte just told her that she was engaged to Mr. Collins, until Lizzie arrived for a visit to the newlyweds.

11. DARCY’S LETTER (track 13)

– Played when Lizzie first found out (at church) that Mr. Darcy was responsible for separating Mr. Bingley and her sister Jane, until the scene where she is running on the bridge, soon to be followed by Mr. Darcy in what has now become the famous proposal scene in the rain. After the proposal, the second part of Darcy’s Letter plays again when Mr. Darcy came over to give his letter of explanation to Lizzie. It is once more played when Lizzie and the Gardiners are on the way home after finding out about Lydia running away with Mr. Wickham (or was it “Your Hands Are Cold”?).

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12. LIZ ON TOP OF THE WORLD (track 9)

– Played in the glorious shot of Lizzie standing on the cliff, looking at her surroundings, while she is traveling with the Gardiners.

13. THE LIVING SCULPTURES OF PEMBERLY (track 3)

– Played when Lizzie and the Gardiners were inside the Pemberly estate.

14. GEORGIANA (track 6)

– Played while Georgiana and Mr. Darcy are waiting for Lizzie and the Gardiners to arrive. It was also played in the hilarious scene where Mr. Bingley is practicing his proposal with Mr. Darcy.

15. YOUR HANDS ARE COLD (track 15)

– Played when Mr. Darcy proposed once more to Lizzie at dawn in the meadow.

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16. MRS. DARCY (track 16)

– Played while Mr. Darcy and Lizzie went to talk to Mr. Bennet about their plans to get married.

17. CREDITS (track 17)

– Played during (where else?) closing credits.

Favorite Peeta Quotes from The Hunger Games

The Hunger Games is currently my favorite guilty pleasure. I read the first two books of the trilogy repeatedly for almost a week, and I can’t wait till Mockingjay comes out in August. When I first read The Hunger Games and Catching Fire, I was more involved in the action – the quest to survive, the violence and all that. On my second reading, I started noticing the romance. Lately, I’ve been noticing more of the humor. For such a dark book, there are portions that made me literally laugh out loud. You have to hand it to the baker’s son to always say something funny. Here are some of my favorite Peeta Mellark quotes from the first book.

“What about you? I’ve seen you in the market. You can lift hundred pound bags of flour,” I snap at him. “Tell him that. That’s not nothing.”

“Yes, and I’m sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at people.”

Then we move on to camouflage. Peeta genuinely seems to enjoy this station, swirling a combination of mud and clay and berry juices around on his pale skin, weaving disguises from vines and leaves. The trainer who runs the camouflage station is full of enthusiasm at his work.

“I do the cakes,” he admits to me.

“The cakes?” I ask. I’ve been preoccupied with watching the boy from District 2 send a spear through a dummy’s heart from fifteen yards. “What cakes?”

“At home. The iced ones, for the bakery,” he says….

“It’s lovely. If only you could frost someone to death,” I say.

“Don’t be so superior. You can never tell what you’ll find in the arena. Say it’s actually a gigantic cake —” begins Peeta.

“Really, is anything less impressive than watching a person pick up a heavy ball and throw it a couple of yards. One almost landed on my foot.”

Caesar asks him if he has a girlfriend back home.

Peeta hesitates, then gives an unconvincing shake of his head.

“Handsome lad like you. There must be some special girl. Come on, what’s her name?” says Caesar.

Peeta sighs. “Well, there is this one girl. I’ve had a crush on her ever since I can remember. But I’m pretty sure she didn’t know I was alive until the reaping.”

Sounds of sympathy from the crowd. Unrequited love they can relate to.

“She have another fellow?” asks Caesar.

“I don’t know, but a lot of boys like her,” says Peeta.

“So, here’s what you do. You win, you go home. She can’t turn you down then, eh?” says Caesar encouragingly.

“I don’t think it’s going to work out. Winning . . . won’t help in my case,” says Peeta.

“Why ever not?” says Caesar, mystified.

Peeta blushes beet red and stammers out. “Because… because… she came here with me.”

“What’s going on?” says Effie, a note of hysteria in her voice. “Did you fall?”

“After she shoved me,” says Peeta as Effie and Cinna help him up.

“She’s just worried about her boyfriend,” says Peeta gruffly, tossing away a bloody piece of the urn.

My cheeks burn again at the thought of Gale. “I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“Whatever,” says Peeta. “But I bet he’s smart enough to know a bluff when he sees it. Besides you didn’t say you loved me. So what does it matter?”

My foot has just broken the surface of the water when I hear a voice.

“You here to finish me off, sweetheart?”

I whip around. It’s come from the left, so I can’t pick it up very well. And the voice was hoarse and weak. Still, it must have been Peeta. Who else in the arena would call me sweetheart?

My eyes peruse the bank, but there’s nothing. Just mud, the plants, the base of the rocks.

“Peeta?” I whisper. “Where are you?” There’s no answer. Could I just have imagined it? No, I’m certain it was real and very close at hand, too. “Peeta?” I creep along the bank.

“Well, don’t step on me.”

I jump back. His voice was right under my feet. Still there’s nothing. Then his eyes open, unmistakably blue in the brown mud and green leaves. I gasp and am rewarded with a hint of white teeth as he laughs.

It’s the final word in camouflage. Forget chucking weights around. Peeta should have gone into his private session with the Gamemakers and painted himself into a tree. Or a boulder. Or a muddy bank full of weeds.

“Close your eyes again,” I order. He does, and his mouth, too, and completely disappears. Most of what I judge to be his body is actually under a layer of mud and plants. His face and arms are so artfully disguised as to be invisible. I kneel beside him. “I guess all those hours decorating cakes paid off.”

Peeta smiles. “Yes, frosting. The final defense of the dying.”

Within minutes of pressing the handful of chewed-up green stuff into the wound, pus begins running down the side of his leg. I tell myself this is a good thing and bite the inside of my cheek hard because my breakfast is threatening to make a reappearance.

“Katniss?” Peeta says. I meet his eyes, knowing my face must be some shade of green. He mouths the words. “How about that kiss?”

I burst out laughing because the whole thing is so revolting I can’t stand it.

“Something wrong?” he asks a little too innocently.

“You’re such a bad liar, Katniss. I don’t know how you’ve survived this long.” He begins to mimic me. “I knew that goat would be a little gold mine. You’re a little cooler though. Of course, I’m not going. He shakes his head. “Never gamble at cards. You’ll lose your last coin,” he says.

“Tomorrow’s a hunting day,” I say.

“I won’t be much help with that,” Peeta says. “I’ve never hunted before.”

“I’ll kill and you cook,” I say. “And you can always gather.”

“I wish there was some sort of bread bush out there,” says Peeta.

“Peeta,” I say lightly. “You said at the interview you’d had a crush on me forever. When did forever start?”

“Oh, let’s see. I guess the first day of school. We were five. You had on a red plaid dress and your hair . . . it was in two braids instead of one. My father pointed you out when we were waiting to line up,” Peeta says.

“Your father? Why?” I ask.

“He said, ‘See that little girl? I wanted to marry her mother, but she ran off with a coal miner,’” Peeta says.

“What? You’re making that up!” I exclaim.

“No, true story,” Peeta says. “And I said, ‘A coal miner? Why did she want a coal miner if she could’ve had you?’ And he said, ‘Because when he sings . . . even the birds stop to listen.’”

“That’s true. They do. I mean, they did,” I say. I’m stunned and surprisingly moved, thinking of the baker telling this to Peeta. It strikes me that my own reluctance to sing, my own dismissal of music might not really be that I think it’s a waste of time. It might be because it reminds me too much of my father.

“So that day, in music assembly, the teacher asked who knew the valley song. Your hand shot right up in the air. She stood you up on a stool and had you sing it for us. And I swear, every bird outside the windows fell silent,” Peeta says.

“Oh, please,” I say, laughing.

“No, it happened. And right when your song ended, I knew — just like your mother — I was a goner,” Peeta says. “Then for the next eleven years, I tried to work up the nerve to talk to you.”

“Without success,” I add.

“Without success. So, in a way, my name being drawn in the reaping was a real piece of luck,” says Peeta.

Peeta wriggles back inside, his face lit up like the sun. “I guess Haymitch finally got tired of watching us starve.”

A disturbing thought hits me. “But then, our only neighbor will be Haymitch!”

“Ah, that’ll be nice,” says Peeta, tightening his arms around me. “You and me and Haymitch. Very cozy. Picnics, birthdays, long winter nights around the fire retelling old Hunger Games’ tales.”

“I told you, he hates me!” I say, but I can’t help laughing at the image of Haymitch becoming my new pal.

“Only sometimes. When he’s sober, I’ve never heard him say one negative thing about you,” says Peeta.

“He’s never sober!” I protest.

“That’s right. Who am I thinking of? Oh, I know. It’s Cinna who likes you. But that’s mainly because you didn’t try to run when he set you on fire,” says Peeta. “On the other hand, Haymitch . . . well, if I were you, I’d avoid Haymitch completely. He hates you.”

“I thought you said I was his favorite,” I say.

“He hates me more,” says Peeta. “I don’t think people in general are his sort of thing.”

“So do we hunt on empty stomachs to give us an edge?”

“Not us,” I say. “We stuff ourselves to give us staying power.”

“It was all for the Games,” Peeta says. “How you acted.”

“Not all of it,” I say, tightly holding onto my flowers.

“Then how much? No, forget that. I guess the real question is what’s going to be left when we get home?” he says.

“I don’t know. The closer we get to District Twelve, the more confused I get,” I say. He waits, for further explanation, but none’s forthcoming.

“Well, let me know when you work it out,” he says, and the pain in his voice is palpable.

UPDATE: You can also check out my favorite Peeta quotes from Catching Fire here and my favorite Peeta and Katniss moments from Mockingjay here.

What I Thought about The Lovely Bones

Lovely_Bones_coverFor the past few weeks, I’ve been meaning to get a copy of “The Lovely Bones” by Alice Sebold. I knew there was a movie, but that wasn’t the reason why I wanted to read it. The reason was that while passing by a bookstore one night, I read the summary at the back of the book. I haven’t been able to get the story out of mind since then. If it was written in the first person from the point of view of a murdered child, and if we know of her murder from the onset, what else is there to talk about? Shouldn’t her murder be the climax of the novel?

Well finally I got a copy of the book last night. My biggest mistake was deciding to browse through the first few paragraphs of chapter one at 12 midnight. The narrative starts at the heart of the matter – no lengthy descriptions to set up the story – and it was definitely gripping. I found myself unable to put it down and finished reading until 4 am. (As a result, I slept through my alarm clock and woke up with a start at 8 am, nearly late for work).

The narrator, Susie Salmon, opens the story by introducing herself in a very matter-of-fact way: ”My name was Salmon, like the fish; first name, Susie. I was 14 when I was murdered on Dec. 6, 1973.” At first I thought the story would be about the search for her killer, but that wouldn’t really make sense if she was the one telling the story from “heaven” because she would presumably know who killed her. At any rate, by page 2, the readers know that it is Mr. Harvey, an eccentric neighbor of the Salmons.

What follows is a coming-of-age story about a person who will never age. If that doesn’t seem to make sense, perhaps it is better described as a coming-to-terms story in that it tells how her family has finally come to terms with their loss, and how the narrator finally comes to terms with her death.

There are a couple of parts in the book that were so well written that they admittedly gave me the creeps. The first was how Susie described how she was being raped, like how she was gagged with her own hat. It was rather graphic, and her voice was very convincing as a teenager. The second was how her soul violently separated from her body in her death and accidentally ran through a classmate – the last person she was able to “touch” – before she went to the afterlife.

There is one thing about the story that I really really hate though. Susie is finally granted her wish and was able to inhabit the body of her classmate Ruth for a few minutes. For a short time, she was able to return to earth. You’d think that her first instict would be to tell everyone who killed her, how she was killed, and where her body can be found. You’d think she’d immediately rush home to embrace her family, comfort her parents and talk to her siblings. But no, what she does is seduce her long-time crush and sleep with him. After they were done, that’s the only time she thought of calling home, but by then it was too late and her soul was on its way back to her “heaven.”

Another questionable portion for me is how after-life is portrayed, since this isn’t what I believe in personally. However, I do understand that people with different belief systems have different concepts of heaven. The “heaven” in this book seems to consist of two parts – an in-between “heaven” where you get anything you wish for – dogs, a gazebo, a school where your textbook is Seventeen and Vogue – and the real “heaven.”

In the end, this story is not just about how the living has to let go of the dead in order to move on with their lives, but also about how the dead has to let go of the living in order to get to the real “heaven.”

Decoding Paramore Live in Manila 2010

I don’t even remember when I first heard about Paramore. It was probably about two years ago, when my then-boyfriend (and now-husband) heard “That’s What You Get” on the radio and was intrigued by the beat used during the stanza. I listened to the song and liked it, but I didn’t become a fan until I got hold of their albums a couple of months after. Since then, my husband and I have been talking about how we wished Paramore would have a concert in Manila so that we could finally watch them perform live. Thank goodness they did! The concert was held at the Mall of Asia Grounds in Manila, Philippines on 9 March 2010.

We were actually pretty late for the concert and missed the opening act (Callalily). While we were entering the gate, people started screaming and I ran inside and was met by a huge, dense crowd and a very limited view of the stage and the big screens. But that doesn’t matter so much – just hearing them perform and singing along with the crowd was such a huge rush. Here are some of the highlights that I remember from the concert:

1) Hayley shouted “Kamustah kayow?,” much to the delight of the Filipino crowd. It turns out she wrote the greeting on her arm, probably to make sure that she’ll remember what to say.

2) Hayley explained that Josh wasn’t with them because he was busy planning his wedding. And to think they went out for a couple of years. *sigh* Perhaps that was the reason why they didn’t sing “My Heart,” my all-time favorite Paramore song, since there won’t be anyone screaming in the background.

3) Hayley called the band’s manager on stage because it was his last tour with them, and they had a picture taken with him with the crowd as the background. I guess they did that in every leg of the tour.

4) When Paramore played the intro to “Decode,” which is not really my favorite song but which I knew would probably get the most reaction from the crowd, my husband hoisted me up his shoulders so that I could see everything. It was amazing.

Here was their set list:

  1. Ignorance
  2. Crushcrushcrush
  3. That’s What You Get
  4. Looking Up
  5. Careful
  6. Let the Flames Begin
  7. Never Let This Go
  8. The Only Exception
  9. Pressure
  10. For a Pessimist, I’m Pretty Optimistic
  11. Where the Lines Overlap
  12. Decode
  13. Misery Business
  14. Brick by Boring Brick

Photo credit – Nikki Jurado